Lyrics:

INTERVIEWER:
What —
What —
What is your dream of happiness, Mr. Flynn?

FLYNN:
There are days
Days at sea...
When you can laze
Along under full sail.

THE INTERVIEWER:
This is Errol Flynn afloat in the Atlantic in an exclusive interview brought to you by Man Friday Caribbean Rum!

FLYNN:
“On bail on a bender
I need some more rum
De Havilland’s a harlot
And Barrymore’s a bum
Man Friday Caribbean Rum”

INTERVIEWER:
That’s Man Friday Caribbean Rum. Your loyal servant in time of need.
And now back to your regularly scheduled programming.
Peggy, tell me, who was it that kissed you that night?

PEGGY:
Mr. Flynn.

INTERVIEWER:
And this was at a party on his yacht, the Sirocco?

PEGGY:
That’s right.

FLYNN & INTERVIEWER:
The sort of party with a fishbowl filled with gin.

PEGGY:
It was late, so I went to my stateroom.

INTERVIEWER:
What happened then?

PEGGY:
There was a knock on the door. Mr. Flynn walked in and I said it was not very nice for a gentleman to be in a girl’s bedroom, especially if she was in bed.

FLYNN & INTERVIEWER:
You thief, you pirate. I hate you and despise you!

PEGGY:
He said, “If you let me get in bed with you, I won’t bother you. I just want to talk.”

INTERVIEWER:
And then?

PEGGY:
I told him I didn’t want him in my bed. I told him I wanted to go out on deck and look at the moon and he said, “Darling, look out the porthole.”

INTERVIEWER:
This is Errol Flynn in an exclusive interview
live at the Hollywood Fish Bowl
With the greatest hit of the 1940’s croon:
“Darling, Look Out the Porthole
And See That Glorious Moon”

THE SIRENS:
Darling, loot out the porthole
And see that glorious moon
Darling, look out the porthole
And see that glorious moon —

INTERVIEWER:
And then what happened?

PEGGY:
He started to undress me, and then he took off his clothes…

INTERVIEWER:
And then —

PEGGY:
All but his shoes.

INTERVIEWER:
And then? And then? And then? And then?
This is Errol Flynn on the brink of a verdict
And folks it doesn’t look good.

FLYNN:
Statutory rape as it is now
Defined is an improvement
On an older law designed To protect infant girls From degenerates.
It doesn’t matter if you had no way of knowing That she was under eighteen, or if
She actually told you she  
Was over the so-called
Age-of consent

THE INTERVIEWER:
Having a bad day? You need to pour yourself a glass of Man Friday Caribbean Rum! Your loyal servant in time of need!

FLYNN:
So broadly interpreted, it
could even mean that a
powerful under the Age of eighteen could
Knock a man down
Sit on his chest
Put a knife to his jugular
And demand if he didn’t
Take her she’d slit his throat
He could still be thrown in jail For doing just as ordered!

MEN:
Go, go, go, go, go…

FLYNN:
Good or bad, whatever the outcome
Guilty or not, guilty or not
I’ll get the hell out,
I’ll leave the States for good
Or bad, I’ll get the hell out of here
Like Flynn
Like hell
You like me or not,
You like me —
You fucking love me!
Love me!

THE INTERVIEWER:
This is Errol Flynn on the brink of a verdict!
This is Errol Flynn.

FLYNN:
Good or bad, whatever the outcome
Guilty or not, guilty or not
I’ll get the hell out,
I’ll leave the States for good
Or bad, I’ll get the hell out of here
To Mexico
Jamaica
To sea…